Diverse Workplace: Keep Smiling

KEEP SMILING: IRISH & OTHER ANECDOTES OLD MOTHER SUPERIOR’S WISDOM A 98-year old Mother Superior from Ireland was dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. They gave her some warm milk to drink but she refused. Then one of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen. Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened the bottle and poured a generous amount into the warm milk. Back at Mother Superior's bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother drank a little, then a little more, and before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop. "Mother," the nuns pleaded earnestly, "Please give us some wisdom before you die." She raised herself up in bed and with a pious look on her face said, "Don't sell that cow." THREE BROTHERS WHO LEFT IRELAND In 1958 three brothers from County Cork in Ireland were leaving their beloved country forever. One was going to England, one to Australia, one to Boston. They made a solemn promise that on every Thursday they would go to a bar in their new country and ‘have a drink with each other.’ The brother in Boston went to the Celtic Pub and ordered three Hennessey’s. The bartender told him he couldn’t give him three drinks at a time. When the Irishman explained about his brothers and their promise to have a drink with each other in their new country, the bartender agreed to serve the three drinks. The Boston brother and his request for three Hennessey’s became a weekly fixture at the Celtic Pub for many years. One Thursday in 2002 the brother sat at the bar and ordered two drinks. The bartender and the patrons became very quiet and saddened. They believed that one of the brothers must have died. When the bartender expressed his sorrow, the Irishman said: “What are you talking about?” The bartender responded: “Since you ordered only two drinks, we thought one of your brothers must have passed away.” “Not at all,” said the Irishman, “My doctor told me I had to quit drinking.” FATHER MURPHY AND THE IRS Father Murphy gets a call from the IRS. "Father Murphy, are you the parish priest at St Catherine's?" "Yes, I am." "Are you in charge of all the finances for the church?" "Yes, I am." "Is Dave Houlihan a member of your congregation?" "Yes, he is." "Did he donate $10,000 to the church last year?" "Yes, he will." IRISH COMPUTER PASSWORD During a recent Password Audit at the Bank of Ireland it was found that Seamus Mulcahy was using the following password: MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofyDublin When Seamus was asked why he had such a long password: he replied, ''I was told me password had to be at least 8 characters long and include one capital.'' [Read More]

Opening the door to Opportunity